Monday, June 28, 2010

Its been quite the week

Earlier this month, my family received word that my moms dad, grandpa tinsley to me, was diagnosed with lung cancer. That wasn't too surprising seeing as he smoked for about 25 years before quitting cold Turkey about 30-40 years ago. The hard part was that this amazing man. One of my heroes, suddenly had a weakness. And it wasn't long until this kryptonite got the best of him too. Last Tuesday, we got word that grandpa tinsley wasn't reacting well to the treatments. He was sent in for surgery to repair a hole in his lung that had been found during treatment . When the anesthesiologist was asked to inflate his lung, the surgeon found no leak. They thought it was a miracle. An within seconds leaks were found everywhere. His lung was beyond repair. Because grandpa was "so old" if you can call 79 old with fewer grey hairs than me, he was no longer a candidate for a transplant and we were informed that we should begin arrangements to make him comfortable and let him go. On June 26th, in the morning grandpa tinsley left this world and made his way to heaven. It was a very hard time for the whole family.

Now I know that this is the way it is supposed to work. You're supposed to grow old, live a Good life, love many and serve the lord and when your time on earth is up your children will take care of you and you will be forever in their memory. But it doesn't take the hurt away from the situation. Grandpa was more than just your typical grandfather, he was wise beyond his years and so gentle and kind. He was a mentor and a wonderful friend. He never forgot to call for a birthday or holiday he was always reminding us to serve the lord in all we do and that he loved us so much.

I admire grandpa especially when he was first diagnosed with cancer. It really scared all of us to be completely honest but grandpa did nothing but hold his head high. When asked of he was scared, he responded with, " Why would I be scared? This is a win win situation for me! If I survive the lord has blessed me with a chance to stay with you all a bit longer. And if I die, I will be with my Savior!"

Thank you grandpa for putting this into perspective for me. I needed a reminder. And thank you for reminding me that the plan of salvation is an amazing thing and it is real beyond all means.

But today and maybe all this week as I fly out to Texas for the funeral, my heart aches just a bit because for the short time I have left on this earth, I wont have his guidance to help me.

But I will do all I can to make him proud and hopefully I can do right in his eyes.

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can,  and the wisdom to know the difference.


Anonymous said...

your grandpa sounds like an amazing person. I love his attitude about the situation. He has it correct! It is a win win situation. It just depends on which way you want to look at it. I know it isnt hard losing a loved one. Keep his memories close and dear to your heart. He will certantly never be forgotten! :) Hold your head high and make him proud!

Heather said...

So sorry Jennie! You have been in our thoughts!